Only one winner in men against boys

Sunday Times

TELFORD VICE in Bloemfontein

MEN were up against boys on both sides of the boundary here on Saturday, but only on one side were events worthy of being called a contest.

On the grass banks, two Bangladeshi men in their 20s had little trouble subduing a couple of Bloem boys, at least one of them not yet in double figures in age, in a game of tennis-ball cricket. But the kids had gees.

On the field, South Africa faced less resistance in reducing Bangladesh to boys.

The visitors, who followed on 426 behind after being dismissed for 147 in reply to South Africa’s first innings declaration of 573/4, were seven without loss when bad light forced stumps.

The gutsy Liton Das’ defiant 70 only highlighted the visitors’ folly in refusing to bat after earning the right to do so on the most un-South African pitch imaginable.

For the rest, their ineptitude seemed to embarrass even the South Africans, whose celebrations dimmed as their successes mounted.

Kagiso Rabada, whose 5/33 in the first innings made him test cricket’s most successful bowler this year, shimmered with aggressive intent. But even those not as stellar looked like taking a wicket with almost every delivery.

That followed Hashim Amla adding 132 and Faf du Plessis an undefeated 135 to the 113 and 143 Dean Elgar and Aiden Markram scored on Friday, marking only the second time four South Africans have scored centuries in the same innings.

Pseudo-contests like this are no advertisement for the game’s most endangered format. Even the shambolic rendition of the national anthem that warbled over the trees from a nearby concert that was part of the Macufe Festival was more entertaining than Bangladesh’s pathetic performance.

After their sixth wicket tumbled with 65 on the board the big screen at the ground could stand it no longer and, instead of the cricket, beamed in crowd visuals from the concert.

South Africa’s bowlers must have felt as if they throwing stones to pick bottles off a wall rather than confronting real live batsmen.

But Temba Bavuma’s catch in the gully to remove Mushfiqur Rahim and add a wicket to Duanne Olivier’s bag was a thing of startling beauty even in those circumstances.

Bavuma was horizontal to the ground when he stuck out his right hand to snare a ball that had, it seemed, already screamed past him.

The home side piled on 145 runs in the 30 overs they faced before declaring seven overs after lunch.

The only time Bangladesh were not under the cosh was in the scheduled first 90 minutes of the day’s play, when groundstaff were busy mopping up early morning rain.

The closest the visitors came to separating Amla and Du Plessis before their stand reached its eventual 247 was when Du Plessis, on 83, straight drove Rubel Hossain for what seemed a certain boundary.

But the ball hit a pile of sawdust and stopped before reaching the ropes. Du Plessis, who was by that stage busy prodding the middle of the pitch, had to scramble to make his ground as the throw came in.

Nothing so silly happened on the grass banks, where, having taken a fearful pasting, a kid flexed his biceps to bursting point after cleanbowling a man twice his age. Gees. That’s what it looks like, Bangladesh.