What IPL has taught us

Times Media

TELFORD VICE, Cape Town

FROM that corner of his mouth not filled by a fat cigar, The Editor demanded a story detailing “five things we’ve learnt from the IPL”. But, as he tweaked his braces and fiddled with a tie knot that had slunk further down his chest with each passing deadline, he asked, “Are there five things we’ve learnt from it?”

Perhaps that should be thing No. 1 - does the Indian Premier League tell us anything we don’t already know about cricket? Stop right there, some will say: whatever the IPL is, it’s just not cricket. Don’t confuse the two.

Fine. Be like that. But at least 191.4-million people don’t care what you think. That’s how many last year’s tournament reached. Who knows how much the number will grow by this year’s final on Sunday?

We can wish the IPL did not exist and we can wish it wasn’t as successful as it is. And neither of those wishes will come true anytime soon.

In fact, as we speak two rival operations are looking to sign up retired international players for T20 circuses. One of them is offering R1.2-million sign-on fee. The other, flogged by no less than Shane Warne and Sachin Tendulkar, promises players almost R300 000 - per match, and that’s for the services of the game’s senior citizens.

Then there’s the Essel Group and their grand plan to build a parallel cricket universe on the back of an intercity Indian T20 league.

In other words: 1. The IPL and its ilk are the future of cricket itself.

Remember the World Cup? Actually, remember SA’s exit from the World Cup; smacked by a New Zealand team that forgot they were the nice guys? Until, that is, they were thrashed arse-over-kettles by Australia in the final.

Point is, the IPL has given us reason to think about something else besides That Six and ethically challenged administrators.

So: 2. If you want proof that the show goes on, watch the IPL and feel better.

Remember Dale Steyn’s underwhelming performance at the World Cup? Well, wait - there’s more. Steyn played just six games in this year’s IPL. He went wicketless four times and took a total of three sticks at an average of 56.66. Is Steyn injured? Or is the decline of cricket’s finest fast bowler since 2008 in fact a freefall?

Worringly: 3. Whatever bothered Steyn at the World Cup, it’s still a problem.

For a while there, everything Gary Kirsten touched turned to trophies. He was tossed into a firework-lit sky in Mumbai on the starry, starry night of April 2, 2011 after he had turned a dressingroom that bulged with outsized Indian egos into a team that won the World Cup.

Then he found a way to transform SA’s nearly men into the best test team, an accolade they annexed on the magical afternoon of August 20, 2012.

But Kirsten’s Delhi Daredevils will finish second-last at this year’s IPL. And that’s an improvement. In 2014, his first campaign in charge, they were rock bottom.

Eish: 4. Achieving success in this T20 malarky is more difficult than it looks, even for geniuses.

Which brings us to: 5. Don’t believe everything you read about the IPL.

The Editor does not have a cigar jammed into his mouth. Neither does he wear braces. Nor a tie. But he does wonder what we have learnt from the IPL. In a word, plenty - which is more than the tournament’s detractors would admit.